Poems

Sometimes

before you arrive

I imagine the drive

the dusty winds

roads blown sand blind

the breath hot desert

red upon your back

the drown of dripping sweat

a mirage, a swimming lake

an oasis, of mind escape

how you travel as saguaro fields fly by

Early in the morning

blue skies of birdsong

winging in summer

singing sweet of dawn

awakened from dreaming

the day is unfolding with love

early in the morning with the sun

we are opening like blossoms at blue lily pond

no words spoken only reflection within

early in the morning with the sun

Summer flowers, all the tiny petals

are colored stars falling to the river

floating in a watery heaven

sailing far beyond this day

into nothingness

into everything seen

like blood red petals

that mingle with

autumn’s moon

I went home, it was a long, dry stretch of road

walking backwards toward the sun

the red heat dripped and pooled

rested in spaces of backbone

a white hot desert, sand blown

I went searching

beyond denial – to feel

I found lost parts

beyond the parch

and peel

Moon winds pretend to know me

clouds steal the sky away

never knowing my name

only a diaphanous veil

what game

night stars

play

A susurrus wind

of chaparral lingers on

after the rain, in the heat of day

behind mountainous clouds

the hissing sun will scarcely fade

until at dusk it finally crawls

and swiftly snakes away.

That grasping glance

the moment we don’t look back

the fall and plunge, the coming undone

drinking deep of August’s moon

sweet the jasmine vines

spilling with perfume

the impossible tangling

of we two

This is a familiar vigil

a walk that turns to run

a drenching lovely rain

a practiced pain

that melts of

scorching sun

Only a taboo train

for immigrants

castaways rolling

steel wheeled

waiting to derail

Still we enter

this frightful tunnel

through blinding blackness

the heart we gamble

to reach the other side

This desert, with blinding beauty burns

a season of birds, always coming, going

before the sun, the raining grey of clouds

we traveled miles over hills leading up and outward

with all its budding ways, the glowing days of May

fragrant petals faded into summer

scorch of our lips, how we slipped

into the ways of reign and fire

our love, only a smouldering pyre

These women, they are old

in touch with ancient ways

the dredging of deeper points

they’ve come to know

and show, without hiding

Their faces are worn weathered maps

lines and holy roads

with soulful eyes

smiling they settle

and sit you down

beside them

In their circle of fire and knowing

these women of the earth

serve milky tea and mirth

their laughter resounds

it pounds the heart

grounds you there

in the fervent pureness

of your tears

A fevered pulse

though sweat moves slow

as night falls

fast upon our bed

breath of steam

we float like dream

to fill the hollows

sink, we swallow

the light of gold

we seek to follow

hear a blue calling

under the ache of stars

as the moon blooms

softly sallow.

Mouth, hands and all the rest

the way you dressed your words

a sort of singing, musical, fanciful

the captivating notes

how they lured me

I fled to escape

your haunting ways

whispers still that

keep me

awake

This morning, upon my wall

with lilies, lilies tall

sun shadows

the beauty

of it

all

Colors

and flowers

birds of dawn

in the singing trees

has only ever been a dream

It was Spring

we drove the narrow highway

southward from Bisbee to Douglas

near to the Mexican border

The town was poor

there were discount stores

sales and signs written in Spanish

there were silk flower shops

brightly colored bouquets

people carrying funeral arrangements

Many were the words

spoken in Spanish

many the beautiful

brown skinned people

all around the town, and soon we found

that we were quite strange

and oddly, apparently foreign

Your eyes are blue water

lovely drowning pools, I swim

some days

seemingly the sun

across summer fields

always, daisies moving toward you

an uprooted child, replanted

you flourish in earth and sky

dirt black hands in loamy soils

deeply rooted from the core

your salty sweet lips

are orchard fruits and fields to kiss

your arms hold worlds of weight

or fragrant flowers to embrace

with gentle wings, you’ve come

softly touching down, a ripple, a rainfall

washing clear my soul – undone

There was a bird, that time, a flicker

they always remind me of you

the melt of spring fever, the tapping on the roof

how like snow, the petals flew

that window, the rain, the rainbows too

the breath and sigh of you

our springtime walks

the way the forest talked

soon of summer to come

we were completely undone

unchained in the falling rains

sweet like music the call

of your name.

It came softly warm, mist of fragrant showers

garden flowers of parchment petals

drank of sun, of moon, of rain

silent, the Perseid showers

a falling sea of rain.

These nights, this lonely space

blue or black, that starless looms

strange orbit pulls me to you

our misaligned planetary arrangement

spend my days ruled by the sun

but nights I trip, faint in a nebulous field

dream in colorful clouds of sighs, with you

tis’ only my fate, I can never escape

only linger under magnetic moons.

Here we sleep under star flowers

a flash of meteor showers

our room a fire light – full bloom

sigh and breath of moon

we travel nights like this

in a sky of sparkling jewels

swim and dream, float

in shimmering pools.

Never run swift and away

leaving without words

never go fast my love, escaping on far off trains

only to ride all of your days, gone from me

arriving in places foreign and sad

left waiting empty

traveling ever lonely

on and on

Oh green I sing, of wings and birds across blue morning sky

with summer sounds, willows round the floating pond

dipping gently by.

Warm winds play music soft

through leaves and reeds, they sing

gathering in the transient breeze.

All the day I rest my head

breathe sweet the flowering fields

never shall I leave this place

nor want for any sweeter heaven.

In the garden, a bird, a flower

gold the edge, gold the dawn that hovers

a song of summer, a tiny sparrow perched

long upon the woody yarrow, that musky fills the air

a redolent warmly breeze, brushes by the maple trees

caressing sweet the singing leaves and breathes the air of heaven

in the gold of a halcyon summer

beyond the hills of sage, grey plumes

a stark blue sky cloudless looms

and sings with birds in lilting waves high above the field

they break the silence in a world transformed

a song – void of man’s ordinary words.

The mad allure

the bite, the cure

haste and taste of you

splendorous kiss

sudden slip, we drip

wet in rivulets

of sweat

Our flaming fire

swallowed by desire

a gathering storm

so calmly warm, just before

the fall, the come hither call

that pours and pours

drops of diaphanous rain

When we were very far

and young, in a place with no roads to follow

only a winding path, a branch to grasp

a place to fill the hollow

Blue the summer, with drowsy daisies came

petals, petals, we drew circles round the sun

gold spun, our halo heads of pollen

gold the bees of sleepy flowers

amid clover grass heaven

Days we lived deep in hills

we were endless green, in unmapped countries

stretching past the farms afield, in other worlds

too far to see, we lived beyond the gray of days

and we were free, in the shining silver

of our hallowed hills of ever

Where sleeps the crescent moon

and drifts bright stars away

to bring a song of light

glowing from a thicket there

where tawny birds take flight

or dappled in the wooded trees

foggy breathes the morning light

with rousing sounds of faeries there

drowsy in their dreaming cares

they bid farewell unto the night,

to stars that sail swift into the evanescent light.

Now springs another day from this woodland place

soft with mossy grays or starry lichen lace

green the leafy ferns will wake

with scented rains, wet upon the bark

incense cedars drift and swirl

sweet, the air of smoke

until alas the sun, so brilliant comes

from behind a clouded cloak

and disappears once more

the dawn that softly spoke.

Clouds, I drift upwards

lofty float with billowing, pillowy thoughts

to places high and heavenly sought

bathed in sun dappled warmth

see the greening leaves brought forth

fruition and flowery goals

some secrets of nature I can never know

see how days forever go

feel how summer encircles

my soul.

Lilies in the long grass

wild with tigers, striped orange

under trees, cool canopied

buds of sun blossoming

pretty cats slumber

sleek they dream

twitching whiskery

breathing slow

slinking low

as if to stalk

shock the

sallow moon

hunt and growl

purr and prowl

animal whisperings

stark the tiger lilies

glistening.

How many times at this cliff, wild with winds

waiting for direction, even though storm clouds come

I look beyond, remembering the halcyon days

but today – rain, rain, rain

Tonight in this garden

a million flowers loom

clouds of gypsophila bloom

through our window and beyond

with fragrant vines, they sprawl

saturate scented paper walls

these night lilies, only a dalliance

that blooms and fades

your hands, my breath of sighs

we are drunk from dulcet wine

sung from the whisper of moon that dips

caress of your reddened lips

traveling this world

lilting softly slow

I woke early to silence

but for the whirring of a fan

the stillness before dawn

I wrote these words

though they never convey

the pure heart of morning

pure the song of the first bird.

When you come home

bring forth a garden, a storm

all the colors of you

a flower petaled rain befalls me

a soaking, sweeping view

from mountains you come

calmly with rain

deep from earth’s core

sweet with petrichor

encircling softly warm

attracts me magnetically

stupefies me uncontrollably

though I know the killing hour

will come crushing, empty and forlorn.

When peace comes curling up to me

comes to rest softly on a sweetest breeze

or in the cooing of a mourning dove

carries my aching soul far and gone

it comes in the soothing kiss of dawn

in the quiet clouds of red and orange

brief a fiery sky, consumes all the

troubles of this world.

This evening, with the wind

of my curtains breathing, I listen for night birds

watch the room grow pale

the finality of day, a nightly ritual

how skies reconstruct themselves over again

twinkle and murmur of stars

cynosure of all planets, even unseen

clouds like amnesia, hide things

our earthbound slipping away

of days lost irretrievable

involuntary

necessary signals sent

heartbeats and breathing

If when you leave, you do not think of me

or do not call my name, then I will be a lost

and fallen star, diffused and drowned in

unforgiving seas. I will be restless on the waves

of my days, blind to all horizons

with dark stormy eyes

then only grey blinding fog

will settle in, descending

with smoke to kill, to choke

my dying heart.

It must be a tricky business

it lingers, hovers stealthily

an invisible silence

a swift inhabitation

the soul awaits

to startle the body

In wordless voice

moves from room to room

turning lights on

spends a lifetime

ever longing

to be heard

When I returned home, after having been gone

I’d missed the fire orange poppies blooming

missed the lilacs too, it was early summer

time for bright and blossoming flowers

there is no place that fits me quite like this

no place I wear this smile, quite the same

I follow bees into the garden

I sing like morning birds

just to be home

high up in the tree

a lonesome feathery dove,

does he coo for love?

I find myself here, wild

roaming the long road home

to no one belong

Spend all of these days

together or alone

Survive the heave and cleave

the warp, the weave

of winding years

A lifetime, a spiral of

trying

flying

dying

This path of sandy footsteps, windblown and buried

this road contemplated, walked upon

the veritable green of a forest speaking

I come out the other side, bask in flower meadows naked

travel to summer seas, float the wild blue-greens

watch the wet sand, of footprints sinking

a nomad, windswept – my days of seeking

I see the watercolor sky, a painting in orange, red

soft feathery ferns, my bed, left to dream under

moon jeweled skies, indigo velvet nights

only to breathe the sparkling air

of this evanescent life.

Gathering colors of day

sea of green viridian, washing storms of grey

seagulls cry in shades colored blue

how mad the ocean’s raving tune

it sweeps away the end of day, a hopeful sun

to paint the sky of blackness

paleness of moon

rises, fades

beyond the sway

of silvery shades

night shimmers its way

into red and blue

where fiery clouds ignite

the day once more anew.

It was only my words unheard

fallen upon deafened ears

a sad parade of tears

the final gasping choke

cruel words you spoke

how blood soaked

my heart – dropped and dead

Oh these doves, they are cooing crazy

a language full of sunrise colors

with a variance of blues, they coo

and soon the quails – laughing

the way they do, in their morning mood

smaller birds chirp and shrill

the air, melodic music filled

here amid this cactus garden

singing just because

their halcyon songs to the sun

and too these flowers

explode in petals of pale yellow

blooming high

in the saguaro towers

Wings they came at first, unknowingly

didn’t even feel them – a part of me

until you pulled the ground

the quicksand from my feet

breathed my sinking sleep

awake

Never leave running away in uncertain winds,

nor leave me dangling as a leaf, high or out of reach,

hung by a thread to spin

darling, you are the sea of my drowning,

the placid lake I’ve come to swim.

Come with your smile, sunning

let your days go shining at the shore

where our eyes shimmer as moonlight on water

tranquil as the silent stars that fall.

Come as the ocean blue, dazzling, opulent

with expansive arms, embracing all of this

even wildfires burning fast into embers

a torrent, a rushing river

our love, like holy water

that finds its way back

to an undying sea.

It was shallow water, rippling

a watery moon quivering

on the surface seen

It was night fire

burning water into steam

gray smoke screened

It was willful drowning

upon a lily bed of lies

parched a wilted garden

slowly withers, dies

This sacred mountain

holds me ever close

this trail fat with hope

to whom I’ve finally

told the truth

Redolent rain

steel train

streak of blue

racing through

night lands

rainy window

sallow moon glow

no reservation

nor hesitation

time to travel

some things

to unravel

go looking

unhooking

my mind

drift into peace

float in my seat

high in the sky

sweet sighs

to feel again

finally

understand

there is

no plan

only

a dream

within

a dream

to feel

a life time

so surreal.

I looked into the center

into the circles of gradient color

the pollen, sun gold anthers

sepals green, holding close the petals

smooth stemmed, impossible heavy heads

beautifully in rings around trees

the honey sweet blossoming spring

busy with new born bees

that fly in fragrant dream

discovering lilies bright as sun

watching bees become one with flowers.

The blossoming green seas

sometimes shines of two

wet, watery kissed

salt drenched lips

of burning steam

bodies unfixed

tangled into

dream.

Alone, this time is slow

though for you faster, I know

out of reach, we do not touch

cannot speak of two

all day I only think in blue

climb these craggy trees

to hide myself away

lay in the seaweed sways

wait the night to swallow

my lonesome day

oh and then the cruel stars

the ones you named

appear, to shine

and speak of you

in vain

I sit here, brood

a twisted mood

think how

to forward move

how to undo

a tricky tightrope wobble

people pulling me

I cannot walk straight

need time to deflate

lose these traps

want to break free

of the need

want to find me

really love me

please go away

you cannot touch me

cannot know me

or go with me

cannot show me

anything I need

from you

I am the juice

the fire

the truth

the liar

you are reflecting

back to me

places I do not desire

I am feeling

dismayed

afraid

of the price

I’ve paid

now is the breakaway

the reckoning day

no plane

no train

no half insane

free to go

free to assail

derail myself

from you

far and

gone.

From this island, water and more tiny islands

heavy treed with Douglas fir

landing ground to ocean otters

while orca whales glide by

spout and spray

the beach, broken shelled

puddled wells of tide pools

filling, spilling over again

brown bauble seaweed mingles

round algae rocks, barnacle shingled

here where the air breathes salt scented

water running wild with salmon

Some say

she is lost to writing poems

snippets, little vignettes of beauty

so much nature inspired, obsessed

with green, botany driven desires

forever in skies, blue, or black with stars

meteor showers, falling, melting

like the liquid silver, red sea of mars

crashing waves, her days

tossed, tumbled, stumbling onto poetry

there is no fault, in words

no shame to be made

would be a sorrowful price to pay

she is writing to find

some truths, a sleuth, a seeker

of going within, without doubt

writing to find herself

most days searching out signs of life

to feel what it would be like, to be

in trees, in leaves, to sleep in green towers

of garden lily bowers

to finally dream in lucid colors, surreal

climbing invisible ladders

in orchards of apple blossom Springs

to sing, sing, sing

Orchard

Walking this ground

we gather rusted remnants

pieces of a lifetime placed

within the hollows of our shoulders

and from the hardened blades

the bones, this is the place

where gorgeous wings

are formed

Iris, how you shallow breathe in winter

shiver under clouds, laid in a bed decayed and brown

your days cold in a garden, green and underground

long through all of winter

with spring only ever waiting

for the unfurling, color blue of you.

If wind

would have known

could have gone

another way around

if I had not been too soon, too late

to hesitate or let myself go – unbound

piled, buried too late to be found

if I’d not have stayed away far too long

yours would be a place

I still call home

I think of mountains

the way they climb for the sky

losing their way through clouds.

Looking up, I never know if they reach the top,

or do they see me way down here?

Some kind of ant, I dig for rocks

a pocket full, turquoise blue

a miner for Apache jewels

exposed by red dust winds

as the day chips away

and carves a night

back into black

obsidian.

These flowers

coronal quivers of gold

heavy headed they nod

sweeping sway of yellow

dancing white petaled

wild spring meadow

washes over me

bouyant in

a breezy

field

This antiquated avenue

of ghostly breath – breathes

throne of the copper queen

and all who’ve been

will never be the same

sun drunk days

desert agave grey

hilly houses, some withered and crumbled

another vagrant, I amble

as red mountain swallows the sun

into night’s sky, so soon

the fading light of day

startled by the moon.